LES ALPES PART 1

Ok ok ok ok, I can do this, I can do this. So what that my legs are shaking and I feel like vomiting? It's just a mountain. A really really big mountain. That looks like, way bigger when I stand on it. At least there aren't any bears. I think. OK. Three year olds are passing you. You have officially been passed by a class of preschoolers. So quit crying like a baby, you idiot. STOP IT. You CAN get down this mountain...without your pride and your self worth in shambles but maybe also with no broken bones. Stand up straight, stand up STRAIGHT! WATCH THE TREE! OK, ignore the guy that just yelled at you, what does he know anyway? He's been born with skis on like apparently everyone else in this stupid country. IS THAT A TUNNEL? WTF??? I'm gonna rip his face off when we get down this mountain for talking me into going to the top.

I'm not gonna die, I'm gonna live, I'm not gonna die, I'm gonna live...




Coming soon..."SLOPE COP"