QRAZY WIZARD

"Be back in a few, I'm gonna go walk the horse".

FB's horse's real name is Qamra but I renamed her Qrazy Wizard because...well, it's the MOST AWESOMEST HORSE NAME EVER!
Duh.
Went back for trip #2 to the horse ranch outside Paris much better prepared this weekend, i.e. wore sweatpants and GIANT mud boots instead of Converse and my only pair of super cute jeans. If I could have worn armor or a metal shark suit and not looked like a fool, I would have. I still got mauled by the two giant Cujo dogs but felt a little more comfortable that they were not going to rip my jugular out this time, maybe just tear a hand off. No big deal. As I stood in the barn watching FB brush Qrazy Wizard and being circled by the Cujo twins, I tried to act cool (hands in pockets, hands out, hands in pockets, hands out) but when I accidentally backed into a horse's head in the stall behind me and it snorted into my ear, I squelched a scream and suddenly thought "wow, I'd actually be more comfortable lost in the South Bronx at 4AM".

I SWEAR I'm gonna get country if it kills me. I just need to get the right outfit.